I came to Al-Anon because I was very angry at a young alcoholic. He is the son of the woman I am dating and he is making her life–and consequently mine–miserable. I wanted to learn how I could change him. I also wanted to understand what his mother was experiencing.

And because I wanted her to be happy, I needed to change her too.

I thought if I could keep my teenage son away from his “bad” friends, he would come to his senses and stop drinking and drugging. I spent years of my life trying to rescue him from his poor choices. It was like he was walking toward a deep, dark chasm, and I was trying to stop him from falling in, but he kept pushing me aside so he could go down. I eavesdropped on his conversations, grounded him from everything, and trailed him day and night. Nothing helped.