To clarify, this discussion format, known as a blog, is a first-time attempt to put the workshop on “Using the Concepts in Our Personal Lives” into a written format–via an electronic, interactive discussion.  It is not an on-line meeting.  It is an attempt to simulate electronically the interaction of members sharing their insights on the Concepts as they would do in a face-to-face workshop.

I first started speaking about the Concepts at a Convention workshop that was basically centered on explaining the meaning of the words within the Legacy.  Over the years, as I became more aware of the Concepts on a deeper spiritual level, I began to discuss how we could use them in our own daily living.  Our three Legacies, the Steps, the Traditions, and the Concepts of Service are the foundation of our recovery.  Most of us are aware of the necessity of working the Steps to heal and restore ourselves, but we generally have viewed the Traditions as something for the groups, and the Concepts were for “those other people” whoever they were.

Under the Introduction tab (in the upper right-hand corner of this page) is an in-depth discussion of the Steps and Traditions.  If this is your first visit here, I suggest that you read it at your leisure.  It may help as you explore the idea that the Legacies are spiritual principles that build one upon the other.  If we don’t begin our recovery in the Steps, and enhance it with the Traditions, we may not be fully ready to expand our spiritual growth as we work the Concepts.  Of course, that doesn’t mean that newcomers can’t participate and learn in the blog, as we all gain insights in a variety of ways and at our own pace.

Let me remind everyone that these are my insights and experiences.  As always, take what you like and leave the rest.  The purpose of this blog, as in the workshop, is to share what I have discovered in hopes that it will lead you to a new and broader understanding for your own recovery.  We all know there is no one way to do it, but as my Sponsor said frequently, “But, do it!!!!”

As I stated earlier, this is not an on-line meeting so we don’t have permission to quote Al-Anon or any other literature.  As it is not Conference Approved Literature in fact or concept, it is not appropriate to print it and distribute in a face-to-face group or electronic meeting.  If you wish to print it for your personal use, that’s fine, but you need written permission from the World Service Office in order to copy and distribute regardless of your purpose.

Each of us has the ability to share what a Concept now means to him or her and how as individuals we have used it or could in the future.  Don’t worry about grammar or spelling.  The readers here are interested in your thoughts not your literary style.  It really isn’t Conference Approved Literature!

Let’s have fun and learn together.

The spiritual foundation for Al-Anon’s world services is contained in the General Warranties of the Conference, Article 12 of the Charter.

The Warranties are the spiritual principles that guide us in all of our actions in Al-Anon as a fellowship. They identify the issues that often lead to conflict and confusion both in our Al-Anon service and in our personal lives. They suggest that wealth, power, and prestige can be barriers to sound spiritual practice; they show the balance necessary to counteract these obstacles.

Concept Twelve is about prudence. When I first heard the Warranties and the idea of prudence, I thought that I needed to be cautious and somewhat fearful–the principles that guided my life at that time. I was afraid to make a mistake, not trusting of others, and trying to figure out how to control each situation so that it would do me the least damage.

When I think about prudence now, I realize that it is guiding me to strike a balance in my life between “I know everything” and “I know nothing:” striking a balance against the extremes that the family disease of alcoholism taught me. I didn’t understand that wealth, power, and prestige could be positive attributes because I envied those who possessed them. I minimized those individuals because they had what I wanted and I didn’t know how to get it.

When I came to Al-Anon, I heard those same fears expressed that I had always felt: money—we don’t have enough; power—he’s trying to control everything, even though as a group we were unwilling to do anything; and prestige—they just want those jobs because they think they are better than the rest of us.

Spiritual principles are not about fear and control. They are to empower and guide us in making the best decisions possible based on the information available at the time. They help me to think in a broader, more expansive way. Again, I must continually seek the right balance between the two extremes as I see them.

I was in Al-Anon more than twenty years before I realized that the first Warranty was about an ample– not a prudent– reserve. What a different concept! We are to have enough, not have fear of enough. We can have enough money to meet our needs, but not so much that we fear losing it. I learned in Al-Anon that money could be a tool for good things. In my past, it had always been something to fight over.

In my personal relations with others, I had to learn the balance between being a good friend and a pest; between a person who could help someone–if asked–and one who pitched in, took control, and solved the problem, whether it needed solving or not. I had to learn to step back, wait to be asked, clarify what I was being asked to do, and then do only that task. As a result, not only did others seek me out, but when I provided the work requested, I wasn’t so exhausted that I couldn’t take care of my own needs. I learned that it was OK to say “no” as well—without feeling guilty or having to make up excuses.

In reaching out to others, whether to sell myself to an employer or to bring others to Al-Anon Family Groups, I need to remember prudence in my relations with the public. If I oversell either myself or Al-Anon, people may be inclined to turn away and retain a negative impression. Before
Al-Anon, I was so desperate, that I made a spectacle of myself trying to attract attention. I was so loud, overbearing, and sarcastic—trying to be noticed and to get people to like me. I had no idea of how to attract someone to me because I wasn’t attractive to myself. When I came to Al-Anon, I wanted everyone to find the help I had found. The reality was that while I barely understood the program myself, I didn’t grasp its spiritual strength. I knew that I had a God of my understanding and assumed that He was telling me what was right for each of you. It is truly in the spiritual awakening as a result of working these Steps (that the Twelfth Step talks about) that I learned to attract others to the program by how I acted and not just what I said.

This entry is the final installment on a journey with each of you to try and understand the Concepts and how to use them in our personal lives. I hope that you have gained as much from reading the sharings and adding your own thoughts as I have. Many times during the year, people have thanked me for sharing this blog with you. The reality, for me, is that it never was about what I shared. It was always about bringing each of us to a higher level of shared understanding.

While this blog will close on December 31st, all of the sharings will remain posted on the site for an additional year. Beginning in January, we will launch a new series on Using the Traditions in Our Personal Lives. Several trusted servants have agreed to write one or more of the opening portions so that each of us can continue to grow in our understanding and awareness, one legacy at a time.

Now it is your time to share how using the ideas contained in the General Warranties in a prudent manner could free you or has freed you in your personal life whether at home, at work, or in any type of service.

Read the chapter on Concept 12 from Paths to Recovery (B-24)
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