Newfound self-worth relieves despair

Amazingly my life has changed beyond my wildest dreams. I had no idea I’d be the one to change—not the alcoholics in my life who are still actively doing what they’ve always done.

I’m the one who is no longer behaving the same old way. I no longer live in despair, obsessed with what others are doing or wondering why they were doing it to me!

Alcoholism is a disease. I truly believe it’s a disease, not a moral issue.

Through attending meetings, reading literature, working the Steps, and using the Serenity Prayer and the other Al-Anon tools, I’ve moved on with my development. In finding out who I really am, I’m discovering that I no longer depend on others to dictate who I should be.

In Al-Anon, I discovered my dreams and desires and found the courage to work toward them. Sometimes I fought long and hard against myself by putting others first. Here in Al-Anon, I’m able to put myself first most of the time.

Taking small steps—seeing a movie by myself, going out of town for a long weekend, buying a new outfit, or changing my hairstyle—has worked best for me. Changing eventually became easier with time. The most amazing change has been to realize that I’m okay just being me.

Being of service in Al-Anon has also changed me. For most of my life, I thought of myself as bashful and shy. But I discovered my true essence in Al-Anon. I’m actually a very outgoing, friendly person.

I don’t have to be ashamed of the secrets I used to hide—I grew up in an alcoholic home, married into an alcoholic family, and then my own family became that alcoholic home. I always felt less than other people. Today I truly believe that I am a child of God. I’m worthy enough to be me and to feel loved for just being me.

By Cindy H., Tennessee
The Forum, June 2007

© Al-Anon Family Group Headquarters, Inc. 2007. All Rights Reserved.